Quit watching the Buffalo Bills and start swiping on Tinder.
Thanks to the team’s 0-2 start, you have a better chance of dating a millionaire than the Bills have at making the playoffs.
According to the ESPN Football Power Index which factors a team’s offense, defense and special team’s efficiency, Buffalo has a 0.3 percent chance at making the playoffs, down from 6.8 percent in the preseason.
Those are odds of about 1 in 333.
Here’s a list of things that are more likely to happen to you than the Bills turning things around and making the NFL post-season:
Odds that the person you are dating is a millionaire: 1 in 216.
Odds of falling to your death: 1 in 218.
Odds of hearing “Come on down’’ and being selected to play on The Price Is Right: 1 in 36.
Odds of being audited by the IRS: 1 in 143.
Odds of being bit by a dog while jogging: 1 in 133.
Odds of developing agoraphobia (the fear of crowded spaces): 1 in 200.
Odds of being left handed: 1 in 10.
According to the NFL database from OddsSharks.com, 91 NFL teams have started the season 0-2 since 2007. Only 10, including the 2007 New York Giants who won the Super Bowl, rebounded and made the playoffs.
Not many teams have started worse than the Bills, which is why they, along with the Arizona Cardinals, are popping up at the bottom of most rankings one can find on the Internet.
Consider: They’ve trailed at halftime of their two games by a combined score of 54-6; they benched their starting quarterback after Week 1 and benched their defensive play caller in Week 2; their best player, running back LeSean McCoy, has injured ribs and legal problems; cornerback Vontae Davis, a top free agent signing, quit at halftime of a game and retired on the spot.
But don’t fret Bills Mafia.
Buffalo making the playoffs is more likely to occur than you …
Recording a hole in one on your birthday: 1 in 25,000.
Getting struck by lightning: 1 in 114,195.
Getting struck by a meteorite: 1 in 1.9 million.
Winning the Powerball jackpot: 1 in 292 million.
Getting attacked by a shark: 1 in 3.7 million.
LROTH@Gannett.com
