5 months ago
The Kausner family of Clarence Center had always been five - parents John and Marilyn, and their children, Chris, Laura and the baby, Elly.
Today, there are only four.
Elly Kausner, 24, was one of the 50 people who were killed in the crash of flight 3407.
Scott Brown: "What has this been like, is there a hole in your family?"
Laura Voigt, Elly's sister: "Oh yeah, very big. I mean there are five of us, but it seems like we were sliced right in half. I feel like you wake up every morning and your heart's broken. "
"Four's too small a number, we just had five all of our major time as a family together," says Elly's father John.
Family and faith and love, those are the three tenets upon which the Kausner family has lived their lives.
And in the cruelest of ironies, it was love and family that put Elly on flight 3407.
She was flying home from law school in Florida to go to a Valentine's Day party at school for her nephews.
Now, Valentine's Day will no longer mark a day of love for Elly's family, but of loss.
And the family of five who are now four, fight everyday not to let their loss define their lives, and destroy what they believe in.
Scott Brown: "If you had God's gift and had five more minutes with her?"
Marilyn Kausner, Elly's mom: "Oh if I had five minutes I would tell her she was a gift to me and the pain we're going though now was worth the 24 years. I wish I could have seen her get married, I wish I could have held her babies, but God gave us 24 years and they were great, they were just really great here."
Scott Brown: "Did you ever think I can't go on, I can't deal with this?"
Marilyn Kausner: "What I've thought is I have no fear of death, none. I look forward to the day I will be with Elly very much, but I know that day isn't here. That's not the life that God's called me to. This is my life now and I need to learn how to live it as fully as I was living before February 12th."
Laura Voigt: "A lot of times I want to pick up the phone and talk her or to somebody who understands, but nobody understands. But then there is a strange piece that she is still with us."
Scott Brown: "Do you feel her presence?"
Laura: "It's not like I hear anything audible, but I do feel this sense of her saying 'it's OK Laura, I'm OK, you're going to be OK', I do get that sense that pretty regularly."
In mourning Elly's death, her family has made a conscious decision to celebrate her fun and caring life, and to honor it.
Laura: "I feel like we've talked about it, and said what would Elly do today? What would make Elly proud?"
Chris Kausner, Elly's brother: "One of the decisions that I've made for myself is I'm going to live better than I did before, and I'm going to make my family more important. And I want her to know that I'm going to be better because of her."
Elly's mom and sister always wear angels' wings in honor of a group that Laura started called Elly's Angels.
Laura: "It's actually a group of cheerleaders that I coach. And the goal is to model Elly, the way that she just energized people, she believed in people. She was everybody's cheerleader, so we have gone to Ride for Roswell and Carly's Crossing and we cheer for the riders and we cheer for the swimmers and encourage them the way that Elly encouraged us to be excited about life and to do your best and be excited and proud of themselves."
And it's in that same spirit of selflessness and caring that John Kausner has become very active in the 3407 families' group, which is lobbying Congress to force the F.A.A to change its regulations that cover pilot training, experience, and flight time.
John Kausner: "I don't want another dad or a sister or a mom sitting here with tears in their eyes in heartache because they've lost a person they love when they can prevent it with simple changes in the law."
Changes in the law and saving lives will be part of Elly's legacy.
So too will be the gift of caring and compassion that she has left her family.
Laura: "Somebody else is going to have to go through this. I just want them to know that I understand, there's hope and they're not alone in their sadness. And I know that people have done that for us and it has made all of the difference, it really has.
"It's our gift that now we get to help people and give them hope, it's Elly gift to us."
